Day 56: (I can’t explain it all)
The past month has been an adventure. A working, small-wage earning adventure. I’ve been all over Yellowstone, all over Wyoming, and all over Montana. I’ve been making a good number of friends here, all radiant, happy people that I am so glad to have made friendships with. I may have already said this, but it’s like the college experience that I missed out on. Granted, there is alcohol pretty rampant here, but I can do other things if I want to, up mountains, under rocks, into streams and rivers… There’s a lot to do, and I absolutely adore being here. I know that when the time comes I’ll be sad to leave… it’s so beautiful here that I really feel as though going home with be an aesthetic drag. Yesterday, Aaron and I were driving and saw a huge group of people on the side of the road with their ridiculous lenses staring off into the horizon. I asked what they were looking at and they unanimously announced “Bears!”. I didn’t understand it, because right behind them was this endless, wide, beautiful rolling landscape, and they were appreciating a single element of it because it was living. I don’t think I’ll ever understand it. Above are some of the elements of my adventures, each a story in itself. The first is of Aaron when Aaron and I were on Specimen Ridge, the second after a beautiful hike in the Tetons, the third Lake McDonald in Glacier. Ask me about them sometime. They are all stories.
I’m really at peace here. This place has been inspiring me to consider myself further. There’s much to me that I have been learning about that I didn’t know existed, and I’ve started to become a more honest person, which I admit that I haven’t been in the past. I think that being true and honest to oneself is really what matters; when that’s been achieved the true person is presented to outsiders rather than an invention constructed of what one wishes to be. Aaron has been showing me this. He’s very genuine, and this is something I greatly admire. I don’t know if I’m genuine, but I hope to be one day.
I’ve been reading into the values and qualities of life. Not in a sense of the quality of in a superficial sense, but more in terms of what I want my life to mean, because quality is something you have to define on your own. When someone asks you what you believe your “qualities” are, what are they really asking? I could supply some placable answer such as my ability at languages, or my personable nature, but recently I’ve been thinking a lot about that the qualities of my life are not such. What do I value? What is a quality, or quality itself, in the first place? I’d love to know from anyone reading. My email address is bornfromblue@gmail.com
